..halelujah...poor child of mine...I sacrificed you...the thin layer of mortal dust that I am...oh poor child o'mine......

beyond this everything...it is so painful just because there was a time...a time may be far gone...far far away...a time when things were different...destiny had his own blows...

now it's round 22...I still hold on...bloody...half conscious..in my corner I sigh..the bell tolls..here we go again...man beat the hell out o'me...break my teeth......let this be my stake...let me burn..it's tough......man you used to carry me on your shoulders...now you bit by bit kill me...yes, I've grown up..grown big enough to pay.....and I swear, I'm payin it in full....satisfy your urges...Spill the blood...Drink the blood....................

no....no.........let's be honest....Spare me......please........Please Spare me ... this soul is degraded down to the ground......guess you've wiped the world off my face...and it hurts...it hurts so much.............Spare me & I shall crouch through the rest o'my life...this is ending up a far cry from those dreams...and I can't take it no more...my screams are merely a whisper...scratching their way through my brain.....spare me...spare me...............................

heh..no I'm not a fool, I know well enough that:

A man is what he is made of...................................

..heh...even the whispers are gone
.....................................
the problem was Split Personality....and these days they have Chemical cures for all the problems of the Soul......they took away all other personalities...now the problem is, THERE WAS NO ONE ELSE OTHER THAN THOSE SPLIT PERSONALITIES

in closed circuits they circulate...they clap...they sing...heh they groan.......in closed circuits...

such private circles...and I'm left out...yet I see...I see & I hear.......

All those noises, that's me passing by everyday..the one who awaits...the one who posted his passion which should have got there by now via Air Mail!!!...

the sooner it comes up, it means the sooner I shall fall...these little differences don't matter..such is the irony of Linear Algebra...we end up in the very same place...down there..where I resonate between morning Narcolepsy & late night Insomnia......the ever Kyphosed Position....

as I sit in my corner in Cordoba, and it screaches, I calculate the Integral of Burning formula and scream "if the formula is constant the dimensions of the lost life are...." but everyone knows well the formula is not constant...yet nobody objects...guess they're too busy calculating their own integrals....with a funny waddling gait he arrives...and screems "let's roll"....and starts carving the sylvius aqueduct in my brain...playfully he has carved a place for himself in there.....a bomb long in past blows up again and fills everything with the same bitter taste.....a voice calls out "psychosis...psychosis"...with chlorpramide & Sulpride...such a pitty gift......

and the man in my brain blows, and blows and ascends...ascends and I hang from it..."man, take me out of Cordoba too"...and the wind comes...and we go...and we go...and we go......and then suddenly I am all alone again in Cordoba...

long times has passed, yet nothing has changed, I am still a victim, a victim of my times, a prisonner within myself,

Buried Shallow, Forgotten deeply...I've rotten, I've blotted and the skin has slipped off my bones

and still I sing "Je Cherche Fortune, aoutour de chat noir......."

this is the story of a life, my life...the simple short story of a gasping being.
...............
the spirits are devastated, they tried their best, tried to resist the last slipping, but sometimes the desire to move on is not as strong as the fatigue that overcomes the soul, and so they slipped and vanished